If I hear one more make-up consultant suggest that I could afford to add some ‘colour’ to my face, I think I’m gonna scream

If I hear one more make-up consultant suggest that I could afford to add some ‘colour’ to my face, I think I’m gonna scream. If I hear one more personal trainer tell me that I could afford to lose a few pounds and firm up my ass, I just may strangle them. And if one more hair colourist insists that I give ‘buttery blonde’ highlights a try, well I just may wind up on CNN:

'Fat anaemic-looking redhead slays 6. We’ll have more at 10'...

And you know, I was so SURE that we have already gotten past the whole 'Oh well, you’re only beautiful if you’re 6ft, 110lbs, tan and blonde, with a tight little ass and unusually huge boobs.' I mean, didn’t Dove launch an entire campaign about 'Real Beauty'? Haven’t we all come to appreciate fair skin a little more since designers recently went goth-crazy, and every show on TV now somehow includes vampires?

And so what if you’re not as thin as Kate Bosworth or as muscular as SJP or Madonna? I mean, is that really the only image we can relate beauty to?

If the only beauty out there is what I’ve just finished complaining about, then wouldn’t the world be an awfully dull place? I mean, either everyone would look the same OR 97% of the population would be morbidly depressed because they would think they were ugly.

All I’m saying really, is please: open your eyes! Stop blanketing ‘beauty’ under such a boring cloak!

Thank you.